Good and bad news
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After the shipwreck, the captain manages to climb into the lifeboat with some of the passengers. The captain turns to the passengers: "We must be prepared to drift in the lifeboat for God knows how long. I have two pieces of news for you, good and bad. The good news is that we have some crossword puzzles with us to keep us from getting bored. The bad news is that I didn't have time to bring any writing utensils..."